


A Muse Walks into a Bar

by JustAnotherUnderstudy



Series: This Should Totally Be A Thing [28]
Category: James Bond (Craig movies), James Bond (Movies), James Bond - All Media Types
Genre: Awkward Flirting, Awkwardness, Breaking the Fourth Wall, F/M, Fluff, Light Angst, Muses, Older Woman/Younger Man
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-20
Updated: 2018-08-20
Packaged: 2019-06-29 20:01:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,209
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15736383
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JustAnotherUnderstudy/pseuds/JustAnotherUnderstudy
Summary: It's just like the title says.





	A Muse Walks into a Bar

**Author's Note:**

  * For [tayryn](https://archiveofourown.org/users/tayryn/gifts).



> For Tayryn: Because she likes this stuff. :D
> 
> This story takes place in what I call MuseLand, where the muses of the characters dwell.

James Bond, agent extraordinaire, world renowned ladies man, walked into the bar. He was promptly knocked a bit to the side by someone exiting at the time he entered.

Apologies ensued.

James straightened his tie and returned to the task.

He deftly walked toward the object of his intent.

‘Deftly?’ he thought. ‘Is that the right word to describe this? Maybe ‘casually’ would be a better description.’

He was so intent on his word choice that he tripped over a chair and knocked it over. He quickly glanced up at the mirror behind the bar and saw, to his embarrassment, that the ‘object of his intent’ had definitely seen that.

He righted the chair and straightened his tie and sleeves, then continued his steady approach ...

‘No, 'unsteady approach' is more like it,’ James grimaced. ‘And I need a better description than ‘object of intent.’’

He reached the bar and the bartender asked him his order.

Suavely, with an air of charm, he said, "I'll have what the lady is having."

He turned to look at M who sat on her bar stool giving him a bored look.

"Alright, sir, one Mai Tai coming up," the bartender replied then moved to the end of the bar to make the drink.

"I thought you were tired of rum," M said with a smirk.

James stared at her for a moment before rearranging the conversation he'd already created in his mind.

M turned to him and gave him an exasperated look.

"Are you 'musing' again?"

"Uh, maybe," he replied and turned away from her to watch the bartender finish his drink.

When the bartender placed it before him, James stared at it.

"Anything else, sir?" the man asked.

"You have any of those little umbrellas?" James looked up hopefully.

The bartender reached under the counter and pulled out a yellow paper umbrella and handed it to James.

"Thanks," James smiled.

M cleared her throat next to him and James refocused his attention on her as he opened the little umbrella and stuck it into the fruit hanging on the side of his drink.

"Honestly, Bond, if real people saw you right now they would think your character had a long lost twin brother named Johnny English," M said.

James laughed.

"I love that movie," he said as he took the stool next to her.

M rolled her eyes at him in the mirror and James tried to be match her serious look. After less than a few seconds of the staring contest, James lowered his eyes to his drink and pulled the umbrella off the fruit to play with it by opening and closing it.

He hadn't wanted one of her serious looks. He wanted that one look she'd given him in the Bahamas. He'd been trying everything to get it for over a year now and, with the new film coming out soon, he wanted it even more.

"Why are you here, Bond?" M asked.

James turned to her.

"Look, we're not working," he said. "Can't you call me James?"

M shrugged.

"I suppose," she said.

She took another sip of her drink and James realized she was almost done. He slowly pushed his untouched drink toward her hoping she'd take it and stay around a little longer.

M raised a brow at him and he attempted Bond's best sensual look.

She closed her eyes, took an exaggerated deep breath, and let it out loudly.

"Bond," she started.

"James," he corrected.

She glared at him and James tried not to allow himself to get discouraged.

"This peculiar fascination of yours is," she explained, but James interrupted.

"The best thing in my life at the moment," he said.

"Then your life is rather dull," she said.

"Look, I just want to take you to dinner," he said. "We have to work together."

This time M interrupted him.

"No, that's done for now," she reminded him. "The film is nearly complete and you don't have to see me again for another, well, however long until they make another film."

It wasn’t as if James didn’t know that, but hearing it from her made him feel as if the proverbial rug had been pulled out from under him. His face must have shown his disappointment because M shook her head and frowned at him.

”James, I really don’t understand this,” she said. “It is rather unusual for muses who aren’t involved in stories to be interested in each other.”

”I told you that M and Bond _are_ involved,” he said.

”Oh, god, James,” she grumbled. “One look between them and now you think theyre screwing each other.”

James leaned in close to M.

”Bond wouldn’t screw M,” he said softly, his voice rough with need. “He’d make slow, pleasurable love to her.”

James was rewarded with a shiver from M. He pressed his advantage and leaned closer to brush his lips below her ear. 

Instead, he shifted too far and slipped off the stool knocking into her. He grabbed her quickly to keep her from falling off her own stool but in the process he knocked the two glasses off the counter and they fell to the floor behind the bar.

The bartender came over to clean up the mess as M pushed James away from her.

”Really, Bond,” she snapped at him. “You are a walking disaster.”

She was looking at her left hand and James realized he must have broken one of her nails when he attempted to keep her from falling.

”I’m sorry,” he said softly. “Are you alright.”

”I suppose,” she huffed.

”Would you like a new drink?” The bartender interrupted whatever else M was going to say.

M shook her head.

”No, I’m finished here,” she replied gruffly.

James shoved his hands in his pants pockets and looked at his feet. He didn’t want to watch her walk away. She had already told him they didn’t have to see each other until whatever time the franchise decided on another film. She’d made herself clear and James would have to wait for another opportunity. Of course, with the way he’d made a total fool of himself today, it wouldn’t matter how long he waited.

”Well?” M’s voice broke into his thoughts.

He looked up to see her looking at him with anticipation. 

“Are we going to dinner, or not?”

James’ mouth fell open as he tried to process her words.

”Thinking of adding fly eating to your embarrassment today?”

James mouth snapped shut as if she’d ordered it.

”Come along,” she said. “We can decide on the way.”

James followed her out the door and down the street, entranced by her beauty.

M stopped suddenly then turned to him.

”Stop musing,” she said. “Or no ‘goodnight kiss.’”

M held out her hand to him and he gave her a...

She raised a brow before he could come up with a word.

”No musing,” he said quickly. “I promise.”

He took her hand and they walked down the street side-by-side.

”Good, because musing without a person to muse for apparently makes you stupid,” she said.

”Hey!” he exclaimed.

But when he looked down at her he saw her look up at him with that long sought after smile on her face. 


End file.
